Early Dance – Haiku

4 thoughts on “Early Dance – Haiku”

  2. I like the intent but I’m confused by the last line – how are the steps stolen and how do they backfire? The first 2 lines are positive and the last line radiates so much negative energy… perhaps make this a Tanka instead of a Haiku, by adding the 2 additional lines clarify the message or complete the mental picture? The phrase “universal resonance” is masterful!

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    1. Thank you for your thoughts. My words are purposeful and with Haiku there is juxtaposition. “Steps stolen” meaning the ability to dance was stolen, but by using backfire, the stolen is negated thereby allowing the child to continue to dance. Hope that helps.

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Published by Jordy

I live and write in Fallbrook, CA, North County San Diego. I have followed an esoteric path since my teenage years, first practicing Carlos Castaneda and the Teachings of Don Juan, and then studying Gnostic Mysticism. Truly I am an eclectic mystic and am of the opinion that one must follow their heart as all paths with Love lead to where you are. Passionate about exploring different themes and modes of writing; I write poetry, prose, short stories and just started working on a novel. It is Sci Fi, and blends Time, realms, worlds, and human, alien and galactic consciousness. I hope you explore the site and enjoy the various threads and streamings. Thank you, Jordy